Open
Okay. So, the reading. It was such a gift to speak those words out loud, to share them. It made me want to finish the Juliet Stories, and share the rest, too, collected altogether into something coherent and complete. The more I’ve reflected on memoir versus fiction, the less it seems that one needs to eclipse the other. Both can exist. Each would be a different creation, and there’s enough material to go around. I’ll barely touch it in one, or the other. Because the stories are so near completion, my plan is to return there first, and finish those. Any publishers out there short on beautiful story collections? Call me. Heh. Pretty sure I know the answer to that. But, the reading reminded me that these are strong stories, worthy of being published.
Open. That’s my state of being these days. Open, not closed. Look at those kids playing in our backyard. They ran outside after school yesterday, despite the chill, and imagined themselves a thousand different places and things. You couldn’t be more open than that.
::::
Oh, and a late edit addition: just discovered this post on the reading by the musician who played for us that evening. His name is Alex James, and he played us an evening’s worth of sweet homegrown tunes. When we clapped, he said, no, please, I’m just the background music! Well, background or foreground … he gave us the perfect soundtrack to a really fine evening.
Back to the Present

Attempting routine after a decidedly not-normal week, with ambivalent results. Three children returned to school, one jolly (the smallest) and excited about sub day, one with well-brushed hair, and one feeling queasy about entering school after a week off. I suggested coming to pick him up early, but he thought that would just be weird. I contemplated calling the school mid-way through the day to ask his teacher how he’s getting on, then realized that would be even weirder. From his point of view.
After a week of excitement and mealtimes askew and late nights and visitors we all feel unmoored, rattling about, dithering, sleepy. I am staring at a handscrawled list of to-dos, on which “blog” does not appear. This is what CJ’s doing on the floor beside me, chatting quietly to himself. Just noticed I’ve left a package of frozen hamburger thawing on the counter in a puddle of bacteria-laden mush. Sheesh.
And now the kid is throwing things. This is my cue to depart for the out-in-the-world errands that need doing, while it’s just the two of us, and we have a vehicle at our disposal.
Update, on a Rain-Spattered Day
An update seems in order.
Yes, my midterm went well. Apparently my mama-brain still retains and regurgitates factual information upon request. I realized it had been a really really really impressively long time since I’d written an exam; in grad school, we had to endure nerve-wracking seminar presentations instead. All said, it was doable. Best of all, my cold vapours seemed to lift as I entered the classroom, and by the time Kevin had picked me up and driven us across town to the Art Bar, I felt very nearly in the pink of health. It had been a really really really long time since I’d read, too. Though initially nervous, and somewhat dry of mouth, I reminded myself (as ever) to enjoy the moment, and take confidence in the words. The words will lead you home. Or something like that. Tough crowd, reading to a roomful of friends.
Where I’m At

Here’s where Kevin and I were last night: in Toronto, listening to Alice Munro and Diana Athill talk about their writing lives. Amazing! Once-in-a-lifetime. Anansi Press has posted a link to the podcast (click on the link above to find it all).
Paper Houses


Things were not going well. Despite paper doll houses and painting projects at the dining-room table. Some of us have been inside for three days straight. Some of us felt like throwing our heads back and howling.

