Sunday at the farm
My Monday contains an early morning yoga class, the coordinating of this week’s many details, a really good bowl of soup for lunch, a finalized book contract to sign and send (details coming, I promise), and eight loads of laundry (no exaggeration).
family
This past weekend we travelled north of Kingston on Saturday, home again on Sunday, to visit with Kevin’s family, some of whom had come all the way from Scotland.
cousins
roommates
Badminton was the popular sport, with soccer coming a close second.
cousins
There was even a baby to hold.
:::
Our visit was preceeded by a minor home renovation. On Friday, I realized that our front hall reeked. The smell was distinctly dog, and I don’t know how to describe it other than to say, come smell our carpet, which, trust me, you really don’t want to do. In any case, you can’t. Friday afternoon, tormented by the smell, I abandoned my office to scrub the carpet before leaping to the sudden conclusion that the carpet had to go. Like, now. I vacuumed the rest of the house in an attempt to bring order to the chaos that had become instantly apparent to me, everywhere, not just in the front hall. And on Friday night, after we’d packed and the kids were all in bed, and we should have been too, Kevin and I ripped up the carpet. Lo and behold, the wood floor beneath was pristine, and after a late-night scrubbing, reeked of nothing at all. I find it funny how often Kevin and I make snap decisions, together, that feel absolutely right. It seems to be how we operate.
Let me ask you a question about cleanliness. Would you agree that women are still judged on the cleanliness of their homes, while men (even those who participate fully in household chores) are not? I think it’s true. I would like it not to be. (She says, heading down to the basement to deal with laundry load number 6. Only two more to go!)
Your question about gender expectations regarding cleanliness? Yes, absolutely, at least in hetero families. It sucks and it’s not fair.
Good luck with your laundry! I’ve done my share of eight load days and they are exhausting.
I agree with you 100%! It’s not fair either!
Dating middle aged men has made me very attuned to the cleanliness of men’s houses. I don’t want to clean up after them! What’s interesting is, the messiest ones don’t seem to even notice the things that drive me wild — dog hair fluffing up the bathroom floor (yuck) and no counter space for cooking. I judge, let me tell you, I really judge.
Do you think these messy middle-aged men could change their ways and learn to notice the dog hair and the cluttered counter tops? Or are they doomed for dating purposes in your books from the moment you see the signs?
I think all middle-aged men should be free to have messy houses — rusty hatchets sitting in plastic containers of rust-remover on the countertop, clean laundry all over the bedroom floor, baskets full of recycling in the bathroom — bring it on. However, these things do tend to limit how much time I spend in their houses.
I agree with you 100%!! It’s always the women who are judged….men are just expected to be bad housekeepers.
I’m a disinterested housekeeper at best, terrible at worst, but I’ve always been a little more wary of unexpected guests than my partners, for that reason. They’re not the ones who will go down in someone’s estimation when the dirty dishes are spotted!
I realize it’s something I unconsciously do myself. Having realized it, I will now stop doing it!